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Kids are raw personalities who need the right guidance and support to grow into intellectual and responsible adults. What all you teach them in the growing years, become a part of their personality and they get moulded in the way you have guided them to be.
Irrespective of their age, you will see that all kids misbehave from time to time. At times, their behaviour pisses you off and makes you doubt your way of parenting. Well, it’s pretty normal for kids to get angry or mischievous at times. But things get worrisome when this becomes a habit for them as it can affect their personality in a negative way. Encouraging positive behaviour in kids is necessary and it needs to be done in a rightful way. Yelling at them or hitting will never be a solution.
It’s important that you lay the foundation early by setting certain limits and rules in your house, right from the time your kids are very young. Ensure kids understand what is expected of them. It would be good if you can explain to them what the purpose behind the rule is. For instance, if you have made the rule of not watching TV while eating, let the child know how his eating gets disturbed when the concentration is more on TV rather than the food served. When the child is acquainted with the rule, he is more likely to abide by it.
When there are limits, there ought to be consequences for breaking those rules should be reasonable. For example, if your young kids are fighting over a certain toy, then don’t allow them to play with that toy for a day or two. This will make them realize fighting is not the solution. If you can't form a logical consequence, the next thing to do would be taking away privileges.
If your child does anything wrong or misbehaves, don't opt for hitting or spanking. Though it's completely OK to label his behavior as bad, avoid labelling your kid as bad or call them stupid. Refrain from making threats which you don’t plan to carry out. If you threaten them that you will turn the TV off for a week, be prepared to do so. This will make your child know your threats aren’t mere talks but you can actually implement them.
Hearing ‘no’ or other negative words ample number of times in a day is quite common for many kids. When kids get to hear the ‘no’ word very often, they drift away positivity. Rather than focusing on what wrong your child is doing, lay emphasis on what right he does. Acknowledge and compliment his positive behavior on a customary basis. Reinforcing little things like picking up their toys, or helping in setting the table, lays the base for good behavior in the future. Also, remember that praising isn't merely about words, a hug or smile can also convey the same.
A teachable moment can never be planned, but you can get hold of them when the chance comes up. Teachable moments provide you an opportunity to give insight and life lessons to your child in a brief time when you have unintentionally captured his interest or curiosity.
You should never expect your child to be the perfect angel if you don't conduct yourself. Sure, the rules for adults and kids are different, but treating others badly, having bad manners, being careless about your belongings or neglecting personal care happens to be bad habits at any age. Try to lead by example by treating others (as well as yourself) with great care and respect.